Learned Confidence

Learned Confidence

Many people do not believe they can do what they want to do in their lives.
Whenever they get close to something they really want, they do something to sabotage it.
Some people get so close to what they want only to give up just before it happens.

Does this sound like you?

Perhaps, you are a fairly confident person overall, but can somehow relate to the feeling of being afraid to go after what you really want. With this type of mindset, you hold yourself back. Furthermore, you may be unnecessarily holding the world back from your gifts or talents. You may have developed a habit of believing that your deepest desire is out of your grasp.

One thing to start working on to change this habit is to build up your confidence. Confidence cannot be easily given by anyone else – it is your own responsibility to do this for yourself. Confidence can be learned, but there is a process to it.

Here are 4 ways to begin this process:

1. Explore your inner child
Children do not yet know what they don’t know. They are secure with themselves and are not concerned with anyone judging them when they cry or fall. They are only concerned with what they want, and will do just about anything to get it.
The key to this exploration is self-awareness. Learn to focus your thoughts on what you want instead of what you don’t want.
2. Focus on your strengths
What is it you do really well, that makes you happy, and serves others? When you know this, you know where your strength is. Some of us have multiple strengths, and that is great! Building your strong points will boost your confidence and bring you a sense of fulfillment when you see how it helps other people, and they verbalize their delight.
3. Expect success.
Without realizing it, we all have some expectation of our futures. Many of us expect failure, and so we fail. But have you ever thought about what will happen if you expect success? I don’t know, maybe you may just succeed!
Being optimistic about the future increases your performance and creates the desired outcome(s).
4. Take confidence with you everywhere you go
When you go out into the world, the world responds to how you feel, simply because we often subconsciously display our feelings in our body language, voice, clothing, etc.
When interacting with others, it is important to emulate a confident person, if you also want to appear confident.
Watch the things you say about yourself, to yourself. Your inner critics have thus far kept you from your ultimate goals. Stop listening to them.
Watch how you carry yourself. If you speak too quietly, you will feel and look less confident, so stand up and enunciate your words with conviction and clarity. If you slouch or shrink yourself, it will be difficult for others to respect you. Instead, research confident body language and incorporate the ones that fit the personality you desire.
People will treat you how you treat yourself.
If you are more confident in some areas more than others, borrow some of that confidence and use it!
For example, you may feel your confidence is minimal in professional situations, but do really well in your personal relationships. Bring to mind the feeling you get when you’re doing well in a close relationship. You may be insecure when it comes to love, but have the most rewarding friendships. Allow yourself to conjure the feeling you get when you’re around friends. These positive thoughts will help boost your confidence in areas of lack.

Always you remember you are just as able and valuable as anyone else, despite what you have so far achieved, regardless of the mistakes you have made. Keeping that in your mind is the initial step to believing it in your heart. Don’t just reach your potential, surpass it.

Written by: Javona Smith
www.javonasmith.com

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